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Tell Her From This High Terrain, I Am Ready Now To Fall

September 19th, 2007

Today Chris and I are (over)packing and heading to the Oregon Coast to at long last take the vows we have been so excitedly anxious to take for what feels like decades. It’s a mock-elopement of sorts, we having changed our original date myriad times, and finally, and quite recently, settling on not settling for next April, when there is a perfectly beautiful coast-line just ripe for the marrying.

(I had somewhat unintentionally covertly posted the change on my “about” page, and then realized not too many regular readers re-read one’s about page, unless of course you tell them it’s been updated. I’m a rather quick study, don’t you think?)

So, with just my babycarrot sister and her husband Vilhelm (spelled more like “William”), my parents and my (BFF) Hans looking on, Chris and I will be taking the proverbial plunge on Friday, although we will not literally be plunging into anywhere, unless you count the steaming bowl of clam chowder I fully intend on inhaling immediately after the vow-taking.

For those keeping track, and for the math nerds of the bunch (math nerds are very welcome here) as of today we’ve been officially engaged for exactly one year and seventy days, having known each other since sometime in November 2004, give or take ten days or so.

We were friends first. Which I love. Friends first and foremost, and of course I’d be lying if I didn’t mention that while we were friends first we both dreampt of being something else entirely; we always thought there could be something more, but while we are both hopeless romantics, we are also both hard-nosed realists, and for awhile it didn’t look entirely too promising. We lived across the country from one another. When we first met I was dating one jerk and still suffering the advances of another who had wanted “to take a break” years ago (not a typo; see: four years), but was always a bit bi-polar with that breaking decision, seeing as how the only break we took was when I grew tired of the back-and-forth cat-and-mouse game he liked to play, and ultimately decided to a. date other people when they asked, and b. fall in love with Chris.

So, as you are probably already noticing, and many of you reading here for awhile have previously noticed, at first, the sheer logistics were stifling to the happily-every-afters we were hoping would skip merrily through our front doors at any moment.

Then, almost suddenly, and certainly unexpectedly, I was able to stop worrying, to stop fretting a distance we could surely erase. I was able to stop suppressing feelings I so strongly and clearly felt, and so, I told him. I told him I loved him first, which I also love, especially because it involved a rambling voicemail left after a slight amount of Kokanee and a large amount of some really bad karaoke.

I woke up the next morning thinking he would laugh at me, that he would think I had been joking, or worse, that he would pretend he never received the message. I worried my spontaneous and yet long-in-coming honesty would be all for nothing.

He did indeed laugh, but simultaneously called me “cute,” * and then reciprocated The Loving, and, while I know it sounds so incredibly sappy and cliché, I would swear my heart stopped beating for the slightest of seconds, and I would have cried but I was smiling too broadly, so giddy was I with the sheer expectation of a happiness that from my vantage looked perfectly tailored for me.

The rest, as they say, is his our story, and I love it more than I love most things in this world, more even than I love curry, which, if you ask anyone who knows me well, is sort of a big deal.

All of that to say, that in lieu of our now only days! away vow-taking, this morning I felt compelled to write a list of wedding I do’s and wedding I don’ts. For practice, maybe. Or just because, maybe. (Chris is right now thinking to himself: “She always feels compelled to write lists.” And yes, yes I do.)

(The style of this particular list inspired by the lovely list-laden Meg Fowler.)

< /parenthetical asides>

I Do:

Not cook. Yet. I promise I am working on that, but until then:

I promise to be the best dishwasher-loader this planet has ever seen.

Love you with my whole heart, and appreciate how fearlessly and passionately you love me.

Adore the way you laugh, and the way you smile, and the way your eyes can be bright blue one day and yet look entirely green the next.

Promise to forsake all others and love you unconditionally for the rest of my life.

Promise to give you the best of me, always.

Promise that on the days when I am a crumbly mess of emotional goo I will attempt to scrape my sanity off the floor and let you hold me until the tide of tears recedes.

Think you are the funniest man on this earth. Funnier even than Henry Rollins and this guy, who is rather incredibly funny.

I Don’t:

Cook. But I think we’ve already established that. Moving right along then:

Believe in infidelity. I mean, clearly, it exists, and we’ve both suffered our fair share of it, but it’s a really bad joke with a lame punch-line and it won’t ever be an issue in our relationship, I PROMISE.

Want you to ever stop playing your guitar, because the lost and in love look you get on your face when you do is incredible. Serenading me with songs boasting titles like “Kerri Anne loves her laptop” is a pretty awesome perk, too.

Think I ever understood what “to love and be in love” meant until I met you. It was never reciprocal like is it with you. Before I met you I know without a doubt that I was never so completely understood and loved for being completely, truly, one-hundred-percent me.

Miss anyone the way I miss you when we are apart.

Know what all lies ahead; I don’t know that what lies ahead will be easy, or always fun.

Care what all lies ahead, or if it’s easy, or always fun, because what matters isn’t the road, nor the myriad turns or bumps in it, but with whom you traverse it, and I happen to know I have a more than capable hiking partner.

Think I will ever be able to fully show you how much I love you. But I intend on spending a long lifetime trying.

Epilogue:

I’ll be back with (so many) pictures (it will be utterly ridiculous) from both the beach-laden ceremony, and the coastal honeymoon to follow. Next week(ish).

Thank you to everyone who has supported us from day one, and beyond. Thank you to everyone who continues to support us, daily. It means more to both of us than we will ever be able to express. But boy howdy! will we ever try.

Until then: love and marital bliss,

kerri anne

kissy.jpg

* Before I met Chris I could count the number of times I have been called “cute” on one hand; in my experience tallish girls aren’t often called “cute.” Now I am “cute” so often that sometimes I question his eyesight. But I love it. Did I mention that? I love being called “cute.” There is something wholly sweet and loving about the way he says it, and it never ceases to make the butterflies come fluttering.

(Post title from this song. One of the very first and much beloved of “our songs.”)

September 19th, 2007 · · Filed under heartstrings, lists!, vow-taking

42 Responses to this post

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  1. Marriage-101 said, on 09.19.07 at 7:13 am

    Wow! If even one fifth of what you said there is true, then yours will surely be a life of love and happiness. Congrats to you both! Happy Wedding!

  2. elizabeth said, on 09.19.07 at 7:16 am

    awww so happy for you. have a wonderful time and i cannot wait to see pictures. it’s been a long time coming. enjoy.

  3. kim said, on 09.19.07 at 7:20 am

    i will be thinking of you on friday! you will have the most wonderful wedding day ever [i just KNOW] which will mark the beginning of the most wonderful marriage ever [i just KNOW] and i can’t wait to one day give both of you the biggest belated so-happy-for-you-hug! sending tons of love your way, soon to be mr. & mrs. J. :)

  4. Jenn said, on 09.19.07 at 7:35 am

    Hooray! And congratulations! And happy marrying!

  5. wn said, on 09.19.07 at 7:40 am

    OMG….that post has got me all weepy and all smiley (simultaneously). I am so SO happy for the both of you, having been a pretty long time reader and a HUGE fan of the both of you.

    Have a wonderful WONDERFUL day on Friday….and I wish for the both of you…a lifetime of intimacy, laughter, health and understanding.

    Enjoy Friday! I’ll be thinking of the both of you!

  6. anne said, on 09.19.07 at 8:50 am

    Gotta love a good mushy-gooey post. :)

  7. Pickles & Dimes said, on 09.19.07 at 8:50 am

    Yay - I cannot wait to see pictures! Congrats on the day finally arriving!

  8. chantel said, on 09.19.07 at 9:45 am

    Oh my god, I’m excited for you and happy for you and almost crying in tenderness for you both.

    Hugs, kisses and best wishes.
    CALL ME SOON!

  9. mcgee said, on 09.19.07 at 9:49 am

    that is the sweetest post EVAR. i am so happy for the both of you (even though i don’t even really KNOW you per se). CONGRATULATIONS!! i love that you’re so in love you didn’t want to wait. fantastic i say.

  10. sue said, on 09.19.07 at 11:39 am

    What a wonderful, beautiful, sappy post. I love it! Much happiness to you both… now and forever.

  11. Teej said, on 09.19.07 at 12:15 pm

    Oh my goodness!! Congratulations!! I am so happy for you! Your ceremony sounds like it will be so wonderful, just you guys and a tiny, hand-picked crowd of some of your favorite people on earth. I can’t wait to see pictures. Have FUN!!

  12. daisies said, on 09.19.07 at 12:29 pm

    here’s to butterflies that come fluttering and all things cute and full of love and joy ~ congratulations to you both :) what a wonderful way to get married!! have an absolutely wonderful amazing time!!! xoxoxox smooches!! : )

  13. Schnozz said, on 09.19.07 at 12:52 pm

    Do you remember in The Little Mermaid when the crab is clinging to the bride and groom cake toppers, all emotional-like?

    I AM THAT CRAB. Is it creepy to ask you both to climb into my armpits now? DO NOT BE ALARMED. I JUST NEED TO SQUEEZE YOU.

  14. alyndabear said, on 09.19.07 at 2:07 pm

    Am so excited for you! Squeee!

    I can’t wait to see the pictures . . . and did I mention how excited I am for you?

  15. jean said, on 09.19.07 at 2:53 pm

    Congratulations!!!!!!! (a few days early). but congratulations!!!!
    Have an absolute blast and I do look forward to see the forthcoming pictures!! Your post was full of gush and ooziness…and I loved it!!! :)

  16. kc said, on 09.19.07 at 7:21 pm

    awww yay! you two really make me happy. realists who are hopeless romantics — I totally get that! have a wonderful, wonderful time. I’m looking forward to seeing 3970984 photos!

  17. Jenie said, on 09.20.07 at 6:03 am

    Yay! I am so happy and excited for you both!!

    Congratulations!!! Best wishes for a long and happy life together!!

    (I can’t wait to see pics!)

    *smooches*

  18. Lisa said, on 09.20.07 at 12:28 pm

    Congratulations! :)

  19. san said, on 09.20.07 at 1:27 pm

    Awww, I want to hug you… both of you… for a long time :) I think you are the cutest couple ever!

  20. Zandria said, on 09.20.07 at 5:56 pm

    How very exciting! And that’s a cute picture of the two of you. I hope you have a most wonderful day. :)

  21. sam said, on 09.21.07 at 9:14 am

    Crying! At work! Congratulations, Kerri! This is so, so, so good!

  22. metalia said, on 09.21.07 at 12:45 pm

    YAYAYAY! Congratulations once again, Kerri! Can’t wait to read all about it!

  23. velocibadgergirl said, on 09.21.07 at 1:03 pm

    Congratulations!! Being married rocks, dude. Enjoy!

  24. Ern said, on 09.22.07 at 3:47 pm

    CONGRATULATIONS!!

  25. kimmyk said, on 09.24.07 at 7:59 pm

    OMG. OMG. OMG!!!
    Congratulations!!!
    I can not wait to see the pictures!!!

  26. Kerri said, on 09.25.07 at 7:31 am

    Congrats Kerri! Hope it was wonderful! My big day is this weekend. AHHHH!

  27. Amanda Brown said, on 09.25.07 at 8:48 am

    Pictures! Pictures! Pictures!
    Oh yes, and this post was beautiful.
    Congratulations!

  28. mcgee said, on 09.25.07 at 4:01 pm

    omg you’re totally married by now. holy cow. congratulations!!! i hope you’re having an amazing time. photos please!!

  29. Kristine said, on 09.26.07 at 7:22 pm

    CONGRATULATIONS!!! I cannot wait to see the pictures! :)

  30. Sonia said, on 09.27.07 at 10:20 am

    CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  31. bohemiangirl said, on 09.28.07 at 8:14 am

    I love LOVE. Congrats! You two are so CUTE :) Can’t wait to see the photos.

  32. Christar said, on 09.28.07 at 12:17 pm

    Aw, congrats! My boyfriend and my love story is kind of the same. We met about 5 months before we started dating and were just friends during that time, but he liked me the entire time we were friends. I had dated 2 completely a*holes before we got together. He was such a good friend and treated me so great. I instantly fell for him and he confessed he had liked me since he met me.
    And here we are, 3 years later! :)
    Can’t wait to see your pictures!

  33. kassi said, on 09.28.07 at 1:28 pm

    Your beginnings with your Chris are almost nearly identical to my beginnings with my Caleb. Happy marital bliss…with or without the cooking :)

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