Talk Is Cheap, Baby; Wine’s Expensive
Last Saturday I posted this mosaic of photos from around Flickr that I favorited sometime in November of 2007. It was something I started last year, posting (all too) carefully compiled mosaics of recently favorited photos, to keep a mental and visual record of sorts, and because I think mosaics are rather awesome. Sometime last year I also started using song lyrics as the titles for said mosaics, mostly because (I like to pretend I’m creative sometimes, and also) sometimes my own imagination for picture titling runs about as deep as Matthew McConaughey’s affinity for wearing shirts.
For November’s greatest hits I chose lyrics from this Mary Chapin Carpenter song, because Chris happened to be playing an early album of hers while I was making the mosaic. Of course I didn’t actually google the lyrics at the time, because I KNEW the words. Or so I would have bet my best singing voice. (It’s nothing like Ariel’s. More like Muriel’s.)
So. I posted the picture (tada!) and the title, taken from the lyric, “Talk Is Cheap, Baby; Time’s Expensive,” except when I originally posted it, the title read “Talk Is Cheap, Baby; WINE’S Expensive,” because I really thought, and have, since I was oh, about eleven, that that was the real, honest, correct lyric (tada!). And anyway, wine IS expensive. You know, sometimes.
I do this more often than I would like to admit–misquote the simplest of lyrics–but here I am, hereby admitting, because Chris was laughing so hard after Saturday’s initial lyric correction that he wandered into the bedroom a few minutes later and started laughing to himself again, thinking I couldn’t hear him.
I refuse to believe I am the only person who (frequently, tirelessly, loudly) mishears (and then incorrectly sings) song lyrics. So, solidaire! (Do you know that if you type “Solidaire” in Firefox and have your spell-check function functioning it will underline it red and suggest you change it to “Solitaire!” Which might be just as unifying.) Solitaire!
What was I saying again? Oh, right: maybe if these artists would bloody ENUNCIATE. (Or maybe if my ear canals would work properly; I blame “Battle of the Bands” and my sixth grade best friend’s older brother who snuck us in and made us deaf.)
Without further parenthetical adieu, I bring you: My greatest lyrical follies, to date, because (there will be more, I’m sure, and) I may be many things, but prideful about my music-quoting-shortcomings is not one of them:
Exhibit A: “I’m a rebel by morning,” by everyone’s* favorite cowboy, George Strait. What, you don’t recognize it? I actually convinced my sister to join me on the dark side of completely fabricated lyrics for this one, convincing her our version was entirely correct and justifying the nonsensical by insisting that he’s probably talking about not being a morning person. Then there was the day we both realized he was singing “AMARILLO by morning.” A destination! Of course! It makes SO much more sense!
But you are still a rebel, aren’t you George?
That’s what I thought.
Exhibit B: “Winding Wheel,” by Ryan Adams.
Lyric in question: “Oh bed of steel, be my winding wheel.”
What he really says: “OR BETTER STILL, be my winding wheel
Oh bed of steel/or better still (which he totally! pronounces “steel,” as if he’s from Kentucky or Alabama, or you know North Carolina), aren’t we just splitting hairs now? And anyway, I totally get points for being fifty-fifty on this one. Right?
Exhibit C: “Impossible Germany,” by Wilco.
Lyric in question: “Impossible chim-i-ney. Unlikely bedpan.”
What he really says: “Impossibly GERMANY. Unlikely JAPAN.”
OK, so I didn’t REALLY think they were singing “unlikely bedpan,” but that is what it really sounded like to me the first time I heard it. I still sing “impossible chim-i-ney,” every time, because realizing what your brain initially thinks is correct, isn’t, is a hard habit to break.
And sometimes? I just like my versions better.
*By “everyone’s” I mostly mean “my grandmother’s.”
ha, ha, ha!! I think you should conduct a survey of mis-quoted lyrics. I used to have a boyfriend that solely sang his misunderstanding; after a while is pissed me off. Story of our relationship; after a while, he pissed me off.
ha, ha, ha!!
XOXOXO
Dinner soon eh?
a rebel by morning! I love it! misquoted lyrics are great. I posted an entry about that awhile ago… http://pale-autumn.net/2007/09/08/lyrical-misunderstandings/
I can’t think of any of mine right off the top of my head, I’m basically a mumbler. I sing complete nonsensical words to the parts I don’t know!
“Sing us a song YELLOW PIANO MAN, Sing us a song tonight…”
I also always thought that song “Turn around bright eyes”? I kept wondering what the freak a “livin’ in a Polygag and giving off sparks” meant.
Correct lyrics? “Living in a POWDER KEG and giving off sparks”
Special.
Apparently, I’m not alone because my blog gets at least 15 searches a week for “Polygag”.
Hee
You’re right, artists need to learn to FREAKING ENUNCIATE! Why is it hip to mumble?
This is hilarious. Remember that song “Who’s Holding Donna Now?” Yeah, barely, I know. But when I was little I used to think he was singing “Who Stole The Macramow?” And I didn’t know what a macramow was, but it must have been something awesome because someone stole it. And this dude wanted it BACK.
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Chris does that to me all the time when I sing a lyric not only totally incorrectly, but mostly nonsensically; he’ll ask me to stop and THINK about what I’m singing, after which I usually roll my eyes, or provide a perfectly logical explanation, of course.
Like when I sang the chorus to AC/DC’s (cringe) “Dirty Deeds” in front of him, and I kept saying: “dirty deeds and The Dunder King!” instead of “dirty deeds, DONE DIRT CHEAP.”
Cue Chris, after he told me what the actual lyrics were: “Didn’t you ever stop and wonder who ‘The Dunder King’ was?”
“Not really. There are lots of kings throughout the history of the world, you know.”
I am so 100% super guilty of doing this and my boyfriend thinks it is the funniest thing in the world. I butcher almost every song and he asks how I could think that the artist actually wrote the lyrics I sang.
The song: I miss you like the desert’s miss the rain.
My version: I miss you like the desert’s mystery.
The song: ” Love Rollercoaster” by the Red Hot Chili Peppers
The correct lyrics: Rollercoaster of love
My version: No me gusta the love
John Mellencamp: I fight with Dorothy, and Dorothy always wins.
A few years back, I said to a co-worker “just who exactly is this Dorothy, anyways?” and was promptly and fiercely laughed at, while my co-worker tried to explain through his laughter that John Mellencamp fights with AUTHORITY, not Dorothy.
I think Dorothy would’ve put up a hell of a fight.
LOL I’ve done this numerous times over the years, and I’m always so embarrassed when I’m busted on it.
I would share some, but I’m too busy giggling at yours that I can’t remember any. Hehehe.
You crack me up!
Matthew and I often debate the real lyrics of a song and then have to Google it to see who’s right.
I wish I could think of an example…
My friend Ryan had the best ever and I’m so glad he admitted it to me one night. He spent the better part of his life thinking “Angel of the Morning” by Juice Newton said, “Just brush my teeth before you leave me.” And he thought it was such a sweet, sweet thing — someone’s lover brushing their teeth for them before leaving. I love my husband and I hope we never see the day that he has to brush my teeth for me.
I always get the lyrics wrong and like you; i like mine better.
Def Leppard - Pour Some Sugar on Me.
“I’m hot, sticky sweet
From my head to my feet yeah”
I’ll aways say:
From my head to my peaches, eh!
I just cracked up over both the Ryan Adams and the Wilco one. Bedpan? Really? So awesome. I think I like yours better.
Do you ever listen to John Prine? He has a song, “That’s the way that the world goes round. Half an inch of water and you think you’re going to drown…” and someone came up and asked him to sing the song about The Happy Enchilada. “It’s a happy enchilada and you think you’re going to drown…”
And incidentally, Moose and I went to see 27 Dresses last night, and the two stars sang the most wrong version of Bennie and the Jets I’ve ever heard. It was fantastic. “Oh Bennie she’s really keen/ She’s got electric boobs…”
My man has some hilarious mondegreens in his past as well. My favorite is “They say the heart of rock and roll is still beatin’.” Only he thought it was “They say the heart of rock and roll is Stobetum.” And he was like, “Where the hell is Stobetum?” But he never questioned it was the heart of rock and roll, even though he’d never heard of the place.
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OK, so I kid you not that until reading your email this morning I have always thought the lyric was “The heart of rock and roll IS IN CLEVELAND.” I just googled it and realized, that yes, yes it is “still beating.” Gah!
See? I knew! there were more. I am ridiculous. I also like the Stobetum version. There should totally be a city somewhere called “Stobetum.”
Sometimes the lyrics are so ridiculous you have to make something up to make them tolerable. Kid Rock has this song “Bull God” In which he deeply intones, “I….am the Bull God”. So I just changed it to “I….am the pool guy.” The rest of the lyrics just flowed naturally from there.
I just haven’t figured out how to work in the overdub of a female voice going, “But I don’t have a pool.” Details.